In August of this year we will be celebrating 3 years since Nate had his kidney transplant. There have been great moments of celebration and challenges. As well as lots and lots of adjustments. For starters we (Anthony and I) did not quite understand the sometimes fragile position a immunosuppressed person operates in. A regular old cold or even worse the flu can lead to i.v. fluids and hospital stays. Not to mention the viruses and infections that a healthy immune system would normally be able to fight off wreaks mass havoc on a immunosuppressed person. Still the cure outweighs the disease so we press on.
Recently, we had a short stint at the doctor's hotel (what Nate calls MCV Hospital); a virus that had been lingering since December was causing inflammation of the tonsils, severe sore throat, trouble breathing and a host of other issues that branched out as a result of this bug. Who get's pink eye from a non pink eye virus???? Oivee.
God did nothing short of a miracle by allowing the treatment plan to be successful. This kid was in a bad way with fevers so bad that the heat radiated from his body. He refused to eat or drink with the exception of Tylenol which he ate like candy. So I know that without the intervention of the Lord I would have a different report to share with you today. As it stands he is recovering, playing video games, was recently baptized and visited Busch Gardens for the 1st time. He had a blast.
When I look back over the last several months, I am just amazed at the level of tolerance and understanding the family has when Nate gets ill. I understand chronic illness to mean that there are good periods with no sickness; to not so great with sickness a little more frequent; to a season of challenge where the sickness is severe. Anthony understands, our daughter does and so do my sisters and parents; but does Nate understand?
If you could have seen his face when I told him we have to go the doctor's (yet again) it would have been enough to make your heart sink. His face said that he was sick and tired or being sick and tired. His countenance said I really don't want to be me right now. His voice said 'why is this happening to me'?
I mustard up my usual bravado encouraging him and talking about future plans and events. I tried my best to get him to focus on other things besides the here and now. I am not sure if it worked as he was silent the entire drive in.
I wanted to know what thoughts were whirling around in his head; I wanted to assure him that his family supported him and that we loved him beyond what we can sometimes express. I wanted to be sure that he knew that God had not forgotten him; nor was his sickness a form of punishment but another step in his journey.
As we pulled into our parking space and retrieved a wheel chair (that happened to be right there, co-ink-a-dink?? I think not) he started asking his brother about heaven and God. Myles, being the soldier he is, replied to his brother that it was not time for him to go to heaven yet. It is time to go to the doctor and that was all. WOW did you catch that? At first I didn't either but as I continued to go over recent events I finally caught this little nugget. Nate is a little worn out; he probably deals with pain on some level everyday but it is his everyday and he doesn't let it stop him. He wants to be just like everyone else, without being everyone else! He is traveling a road that few of us will have the privilege or burden to; and he does it with child-fused enthusiasm and joy. Yet he is still human and in that moment he relayed to his brother (autism was not a factor during this exchange) that he was just 'over it'. I thank God his brother was there to give him the facts and nothing but the facts. It ain't time for him to go to heaven yet so suck it up (lol).
As I mentioned earlier God banished the virus (Nate's exact words). There was no evidence of a live virus and quite honestly we don't know what was making him so ill. I do know however, a few new things that have strengthen me on my own journey and they are:
1. Nate talks to God and is confident the Lord hears him
2. Nate believes what God tells him without question because he is confident in the Lord's Words
3. Nate's mission to show people the healing power of God starts first with his family
4. Nate is a teacher leading by example! He is a soldier who forages on pressing toward a goal that God has set for him
5. He has been given a helper, his brother, to meet him where he is, advocate for him and to encourage him when he is weak
6. God has more than prepared him for this journey by giving him good company to walk with
I must say that this last stay took a little more from me than I care to admit. I share my son's weariness sometimes but I also share my strength with him. We move forward celebrating health as it is given to us! lavishing in the joy of a new day that is granted to us and holding on to the hope that God has promised us. Chronic kidney disease is with us but it doesn't overcome us. It is just a part of our lives.
sj
1. at hospital 2. shortly after release
3. Myles vigilantly keeping watch over is brother during Spring Break
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