REFLECTION

REFLECTIONS

So, this is 50? Graduate of 1988..when big hair, neon socks and rubik's cube were all the rage. When "Candy" and Cameo were getting it done; Pontiac was still a force with the release of the new Trans-Am. When I first started experimenting with way too many of the wrong things trying to find where I "fit" in not realizing that I was my own club. 

This is where I first learned that all friendships don't last forever, people get separated and grow in different directions sometimes its for the best. I remember joining the choir at my college after I went away that fall. I was never fond of the idea of going into more school and wanted to explore other options but we were a middle class black family with roots from the south so there was no other option. My parents lived through the Civil Rights Movement... their movement and understood the power of education. Doors were knocked down and barriers were removed to the point where my generation could do whatever we wanted because of their diligence. The fact that I was interested was of little consequence. 

After flunking out I decided to try and find myself. I remember telling my grandfather that and he said what do you mean? Just look in the mirror and there you are. Get a job, do a good job and you will get ahead but don't just do nothing. I kinda listened and  spent the next 15+ years doing next to nothing. I don't count getting into lots of trouble, hairy predicaments and other questionable judgments as completing anything productive with the exception on becoming a Mom.

Eventually, I settled in got married had more kids and thought let me get serious about life. Jobs were plentiful the economy, from my perspective, was strong so off in pursuit of whatever my dream was. A house, car, job wasn't enough to satisfy me. I thought once I procured these items I would be filled with a sense of completion. I was and I wasn't; meaning it lasted a short time but eventually the gnawing for something better returned. I didn't know what it was at the time so I continued to fill my vacuum with meaningless things. 
One job after another job until... my well of ideas ran dry. I was tired of being turned away for positions I was over qualified for but I wasn't part of the in-crowd. Therefore I was kept back because it suited the powers-that-be. I was at a crossroads. I had tried a vacation; new car; new hairstyle.. etc. Nothing was working for me. I was miserable. Then one day an awesome co-worker saw my frustrations and told me I needed to get a degree. She gave me the best advice anyone working could have! She shared with me that I needed to use what I had to get what I wanted. Our company had a class reimbursement policy so pick a degree program and get to it. Take away the excuses as to why you were never promoted and after all is said and done even if they don't formally recognize you, you will have acquired a degree and no one can take that from you. 
So back to school I went and this time it was what I wanted. 

Fast forward...I guess I should save  Part 2 another day.  Don't you just love ClIFFHANGERS!

 sj