Life continues to amaze, confound and enlighten me at the same time. As I sit here in recovery mode I get to have a ring side seat of observation. My sons are trying their best to ride the waves of change in our home. Their routine has been disrupted and the security of 'mom's way' has been challenged. Instead of flowing like water uninterrupted in a brook, their morning routine is a mixture of the familiar and new. Some mornings their Nana helps them, some mornings dad, who lacks culinary skills, fixes their breakfast or dinner; rarely in the past 3 weeks have I, their mom, given them anything familiar.
This is where I get to see the man I committed my life too, struggle to make bacon and eggs; struggle to keep the kids on task with the daily routine; soar when it comes to helping with homework - especially science all at the same time checking in on me to make sure he can try and meet any of my physical needs. Oh and I forgot to mention that he is also challenged to complete this dance in front of his mother-n-law. Whew that is mouthful. But he does it the best that he can never losing sight of what the goal is and that is to service the household so that it can keep running. To serve his children so that they can learn to trust and rely on him as much as they do me. To serve his mother-n-law so that honor is brought to my father's house and peace is maintained. This is not an easy task to balance as the counterweight has been temporary sidelined. But he is doing it, in his way on his terms. I don't always agree with his method but then I am reminded of why GOD placed man and woman in the bond of marriage to raise a family. We need both sets of skills that each one can offer. There are so many things I can take away from in this time of healing, but the most prevalent is the importance of peace. My spouse does not cut toast like I do but does it really matter? No it doesn't. Having a new sense of appreciation of him as he attempts to juggle his duties and mine - well yes that is what matters. Showing compassion, patience and understanding also matters. He is stressed too. Remembering my mantra doesn't hurt either - To know your mate you must love your mate and to love your mate you must know him - (Degrees of Perfection, Winter 2013)
Have you ever traded roles with your spouse? you should it would help bring more understanding and appreciation into your relationship - sickness has a way of doing that but don't let that be the catalyst let love be it.
Purpose to enjoy all the gifts of today that God offers,
With Love Souljourner Howard